State of the Orc Army, November 2025

 So looking back...I haven't gotten my entire Oldhammer orc and goblin army out on the table since May 2024. I have added a couple of units and big figures to the army since then, and some discussion around Warhammer: The Old World and One Page Rules Regiments with the guys I've been playing Dracula's America with got me inspired to carry everything up from the basement, array it out on the dining room table, and take stock of where I'm at.

This is my midlife crisis, by the way. No sports cars, or giant tattoos, or peroxide-blonde mistresses half my age. No, my midlife crisis is building an all-metal Warhammer army that weighs 30 lbs. The mistress might be less expensive...

First up, the goblins - 39 (plus shaman) with hand weapons, and 20 (plus shaman) with bows, two small units of 5 wolf riders with bows, and a wolf chariot, plus a character riding a wolf. I need to dig out and paint some shields for the hand weapons unit. I've got figures here from Warmonger, Knightmare, Black Tree Design, Midlam Miniatures and Games Workshop; I have another unit of wolf riders from Satyr Art Studios, as well as a couple of frankensteined chariots (including one being ridden by a shaman) in my project box still.

Next up, "Da Red Bastids" - 25 Orcs with hand weapons and shields from Warmonger Miniatures. Behind them are four Bog Trolls sculpted by Drew Williams of Satyr Art Studios years ago; I bought them from him before he sold the molds to the now-defunct Troll Soup Miniatures. I have another four Bog Trolls (purchased from Troll Soup) in my project box.

I better look at the trolls. I would run these as River Trolls in Warhammer, I think. The little runt is from Warmonger Miniatures, and the Empire casualty is a Landsknecht casualty from Warlord Games.

Up next are the Old Guard - this unit is made up almost entirely of eBay rescues, and are all sculpts initially released between 1985 and 1996. Figures here are from Games Workshop, Marauder Miniatures, Alternative Armies and Heartbreaker Miniatures.

Behind them are some artillery pieces - an eBay rescue "Doom Diver" from Games Workshop (I have another, new in box, that a friend found in their attic 20+ years after buying it), and an "Orcquebus" from Warmonger Miniatures that I proxy as a Rock Lobber. 

Up next are the "Kingbreakers" - another unit of Warmonger Orcs. I had two figures on a 25x50 base in the back row that the spaced out movement tray didn't allow me to use, so I've subbed in two orcs I painted for a baggage train. 

Behind them you can see my giant, from Old School Miniatures - I've named him Simon, after the friend who gifted him to me. The runt on the base came with the Doom Diver. 

"The Blackfire Boyz" are "Mercenary Orcs" from Warmonger Miniatures and in some of my favorite orcs that Kev Adams ever sculpted; they're encrusted with detail that brings them to life without bogging down the painting. I've painted them in the colors of Averland, the Imperial Province bordering on the Black Fire Pass and frequent defenders against orc raids in the lore of Warhammer Fantasy. The idea being, they've begun imitating the tactics of their imperial foes, and dressing in uniforms stripped off the dead. This was my first big paper banner (and first time drilling a hand for a 100mm steel flagpole) and I'm still really pleased with how it turned out.

Behind them are kind of an odd unit. These 10 "Barnorsk Great Orcs" I got from Black Tree Design in 2018, and were what initially sparked my desire to build an all-metal orc and goblin army. The paintwork is not up to my current standards and I was never happy with the old Citadel shields I put on them, so I'm not sure I'd put them on the gaming table these days; I have quite a few more (obtained with no small degree of frustration given the issues one has these days trying to buy figures from BTD!) primed and awaiting painting, so the thought is always in the back of my mind to retire these fellows and honor them as the progenitors of the entire project. 

I'm really proud of my Boar Boyz. These are from Knightmare Miniatures, and I did a fair amount of converting on these with weapon swaps, creating a standard bearer, and a musician who has a lute on his back. I'm proud of how many pig jokes I worked in - "Sum Pig," "Pork Chop," "Hog Wild," etc., and the banner is a flying pig. I think the supersized banner didn't work out quite as well this time.

"Harboth's Orc Archers," from 1987. I feel a special affinity to these guys - they first released right around the time I was born. I managed to score a phenomenally good deal on a full box set, plus some extra figures, back in 2020, and doing a full unit of 20 with freehanded face shields and a paper banner felt so satisfying. I think I can honestly say this is my favorite unit in the whole army. They're on a split movement tray so I can readily deploy them in two ranks of 10, or four ranks of 5. 

And then the characters:

I'm still really pleased with the Shaman on Wyvern figure I painted earlier this year. Still have to paint some banners for him though. 

So what's next? I have a half-finished unit of orc boyz with a shaman accompanying them, and two more units primed and waiting their turn, plus a couple chariots primed and awaiting painting/final assembly. Then there's a unit of night goblins that could be primed, more goblin archers, more trolls...I have a lot in the back log. 

I think I got demoralized for a while with this project between not having a nice display cabinet for them and realizing I just wasn't enjoying Warhammer: The Old World. The guys I played with during the summer were nice enough, but having to stop every turn and consult three rulebooks plus an errata document wasn't my idea of a good time and the other guys at the game store were quickly leaning into tournament mindsets, and that's just not me. 

Talking about One Page Rules with the guys I play Dracula's America with felt reinvigorating; I've always treated this project as some blend of actual gameable army and art project, a means of saying "Hey, 14 year old me, we finally have a really cool Warhammer army! We did it!" and I think right now I feel like gaming with them again for the first time in months. And maybe that means I'll finish painting another regiment, maybe some more chariots. Maybe I'll finally get my second orc on wyvern out and assembled in 2026. 

Looting the Secondhand Bin at my FLGS...Again

 My wife is a generous god. Today is our wedding anniversary, and we both scheduled ourselves off work with plans to visit a local greenhouse/conservatory that is having a butterfly exhibition. Unfortunately, it's extremely hot today and Gina's MS flares up when she overheats - so between the fact that it's a bit of a hike from parking to the greenhouse and it's a hot, steamy greenhouse, we decided it might not be in our best interest to go today. Instead, she proposed we take a trip to Harlequin Hobby - I'd been wanting to check their collection of decal sheets for some Orc/Ork decals, and with her blessing I also spent some time digging through the file boxes of secondhand figures. I came away with some real goodies!

First up, another blister pack of old metal Night Goblin fanatics, as well as a metal Black Orc standard bearer that had been converted by a previous owner with a resin head. A vintage Orc Shaman and a goblin with a flail that was I think originally a Heartbreaker miniature. 

When I went to pay for these (as well as my sheet of Ork decals), she insisted on treating me. 

Why yes, I did marry out of my league. 

Figures Purchased in 2025: 120

Figures Painted in 2025: 121

State of the Orc Army, May 2024

 Been a while since I've posted! Haven't done a ton of gaming since March; we're actually moving at the end of the summer, from our current one bedroom apartment into an actual house! In fact, the house I grew up in; my parents are looking to downsize as they get older, so my wife and I are buying their house from them. A lot of my wargaming terrain has already been moved into the basement at the house, just because it's delicate and I didn't want to risk anything breaking if I could help it. My painted miniatures will all be moved over in the coming weeks as well.

In the meantime, I did get my entire Oldhammer orc and goblin army out on the table this past weekend for the six-month muster. 

First things first, here's the entire* army:

So this technically isn't everything that's painted; my 3rd edition Hobgoblin contingent wasn't unpacked for this, and my Doom Diver catapult needs some repairs so it was left off the table this time around. Let's take a closer look:

Some miscellaneous characters; since the last muster I've added Grimgor Ironhide, Black Orc Warboss from Games Workshop, 6th edition WHFB on the left there, and a Heartbreaker Orc Shaman (now available through Ral Partha Europe) on the far right. 

Goblins! I've added a unit of Wolfriders from Warmonger miniatures (foreground) and a wolf chariot (in the back) from GW, as well as a shaman from Old School Miniatures (red hood). Someday soon I should bulk out that regiment of 12 up to...around 40. Maybe 48. 

These are really special. I painted the first 12 of Harboth's Orc Archers from 1987 back in 2021, and finished the remaining 8 (including standard bearer, musician and champion) in January of this year. They all have hand-painted face shields and I freehanded the banner as well. Behind them you can see one of my two 25-strong Orc regiments.

"The Old Guard" is 35-strong, consisting of orcs released between 1985 and 1996; a mix of Citadel, Marauder, Heartbreaker, Alternative Armies, maybe some I'm forgetting.

My Boar Boyz, from Knightmare Miniatures; have done a couple weapon swaps on these, including making the standard bearer.

Up front are my Black Orcs; these are "Barnorsk Great Orcs" from Black Tree Design, and the first figures I painted for this army. I have another 10 to add to them, and I'll be redoing shields. Also probably redoing the standard bearer, replacing the cast standard pole with a 4" steel pin and a new paper flag. Behind them is my second 25-man orc unit.

Trolls are from Satyr Art Studio originally; the molds were sold to Troll Soup Miniatures but I don't know if they're still in production; they're marked sold out every time I check the site. Next to them is a Warmonger Orc carrying a siege gun, which I'll be using as a Rock Lobber.

I have no idea if they'll ever make it on the table for a game, but I do still love the "Black Fire Boyz" - a group of orcs that have started wearing Imperial uniforms stripped from fallen foes and imitating pike tactics. 

And finally the baggage train; again, not something that'll ever see use past 3rd edition games (should those ever happen for me), but a characterful and fun addition. 

So that's it for now, minus the units I mentioned above. 

What's next?

I did recently score a complete set of the 2002 version of Ruglud's Armored Orcs, sculpted by Brian Nelson during the 6th edition era. These were kind of a "White Whale" for me - the issue of White Dwarf they were introduced in was one of the first issues I had as a teenager entering the hobby, and every greenskins army list I wrote up back then included them as a choice. Those are on my painting table right now. 

I have a bunch of chariots, more goblins, more black orcs, a unit of Night Goblins to do...

Really the biggest thing I should do is magnetize all these bases. I have 3D printed movement trays to adapt these base sizes to Warhammer: The Old World and I really should get magnets and steel squares so I can take these to a game without spending an hour ranking everyone up at the table.

State of the Orc Army - Memorial Day 2023

 Afternoon all, today is a federal holiday in the United States and so I had the day off work. Having gotten quite a bit of work done on my Oldhammer Orc project this month, I decided to unpack everything and get it on the table - see what I've done since the last review, and get a sense of what I want to add. Not to toot my own horn too hard here, but I'm honestly impressed to see what I've done so far:

All total, that's 115 Orcs, 47 Goblins, 15 Hobgoblins, 4 Trolls, 5 "Hobhounds," 5 Boars and 6 Wolves. A unit-by-unit breakdown (mostly) follows:

A unit of Goblin Wolf Riders with bows, joined by a Goblin Big Boss. A second unit of these is in my project box, waiting to be assembled and painted.

Harboth's Orc Archers, a classic regiment from 1987. I still need to do shields for them, and I have a large number of these in my closet that I could strip 30-year old enamel paints off and paint up if I so desired. Behind them is a Doom Diver catapult, ready to fling goblins across the battlefield. 

Da Red Bastids tribe, with a unit of Bog Trolls behind them. Da Bastids are done, I have four unpainted trolls in my project box awaiting painting.

The Black Fire Boyz, a unit of orcs that have begun wearing stolen Averland uniforms and imitating pike and shotte tactics. This unit is complete - I don't want to paint more puff and slash.

The first regiment painted back in 2019, these Black Orcs will be expanded out to 15 and given new shields. Behind them is Mighty Epigruel's Slop 'n' Go Chuck Wagon. I wish baggage trains had persisted in WHFB past 3rd edition. 

The Kingbreakers, my second block of 25 orcs. 

Some characters - a classic Orc Boar Boy, an Orc Commander from Knightmare Miniatures, an Orc Shaman and an early 2000s Games Workshop Savage Orc Shaman. Behind them are a block of Goblin Archers. The orc shaman's staff has a crack on the shaft, and I'm concerned it's going to snap off right above his hand. I've tried wicking some superglue into the crack to bond it, but if that proves to not be enough I'll replace it with a skull just above his hand - turning the staff into a shorter walking stick. 

A unit of Knightmare Miniatures' goblins up front, and behind them an Orc chariot converted from a Foundry Beastman chariot, and in the back "The Old Guard," my Orc Big'uns regiment (joined by the Battle Standard Bearer). I have enough goblins, from a couple manufacturers, rattling around in a box to where I could bulk this unit out to 40, maybe even almost 50 if I really wanted to, but it's not the highest priority.

The Old Guard are all sculpts first released between 1985 and 1996, mostly Citadel, but there are a few Heartbreaker figures in there as well. I've got 19 figures painted, and it will be bulked up to a 36-figure block. I've got more Citadel and Heartbreaker, as well as some Marauder and Alternative Armies figures in the project box waiting to be cleaned, based and painted; I think I still need to buy just 3 more figures to complete the unit. 

My Hobgoblin Mercenary Contingent, not fieldable in any edition of Warhammer Fantasy Battles more recent than 3rd. I've got a dozen Mourngul Renegades, along with a Shaman and a Contingent Commander riding a Temple Dog (represented by a Reaper Krung Beast). In front, a Hobgoblin Beastmaster drives a herd of Hobhounds (represented by Knightmare Gnashers) before him. 

A better look at the Baggage Train. Part of me wants to add a couple more wagons (a torturer's cart and maybe a mobile shrine to Gork and/or Mork), but again, not a very high priority. 

So what's left to add?

There's a couple additional units I want to add:

• 10 Orc Boar Riders. I collected these and made a few conversions (a standard bearer, musician, and a couple of weapon swaps), and they've been sitting primed and ready to go waiting for me to get a storage case to put them in afterwards. I've got the case now so these might be next on the table.
• Another unit of five Goblin Wolf Riders, plus a Boss. I have these in the project box, I just need to get a Boss figure.
• 15 Savage Orcs, to be fielded with the Savage Orc Shaman seen above attached. I've got 13 of the Mark Bedford-sculpted Savage Orcs from 2000, a few of which need some stripping, including a full command. Just need to collect two more. 
• A Rock Lobber - this will be proxied with a Foundry/Warmonger "Mercenary Great Orc" carrying a gigantic medieval firearm (the "Orquebus"), surrounded by a crew of goblins ready to clean and reload between shots. This is already in my project box, though I might still add a Warmonger "Orcling" holding a telescope as a spotter. 
• Mangler Squig. I don't know if I'll ever play 8th edition WHFB, which introduced this unit, but I have the Knightmare "Giant Gnasher" and I'm looking forward to making a diorama base for it. 
  

And a couple units that need expansion:

• Another 5 Black Orcs painted, plus shields. I've got two in my project box, I just need to pick up three more. Shields will be the kite-shaped face shields from Foundry/Warmonger. 
• At least two more Trolls painted.
• 17 more Orcs for the Old Guard. I think I've got 14 in my project box, so I'll need to source three more.
   

 This project has given me a lot of joy since I started it in 2019, and also a lot to think about. One thing I've noticed in social media spaces devoted to miniature painting and wargaming, as well as in the language used to market products to us, is an emphasis on "spend less time painting" and "get [y]our army on the table faster." Faster, faster, faster - always faster! Does 21st century life not move fast enough already?

I've absolutely and categorically rejected this messaging. Being thoughtful and methodical in every aspect of this project has been the key to my enjoyment. Browsing manufacturers' websites, supporting small businesses, and taking the time to base coat, wash, highlight every figure...I have an army that is entirely my own, painted in my own style. I've gotten faster at it through dint of practice, rather than using tools and techniques designed to speed up the process. 

Something I've seen a lot of among people playing the latest edition of Warhammer 40K or Age of Sigmar is buying an army, speed painting it, playing with it for a season, then selling it to pay for next year's army. And that's just not for me; in ten years' time I expect to still be admiring this army in a lit display case in my home. It's been an investment in my own happiness and honestly, my health (I had my annual physical last week, and I attribute my improved blood pressure to spending less time on social media and more time painting orcs), and I'm far richer for having taken the route I did with them.

Merry Christmas and State of the Orc Army

 Merry Christmas everyone, I hope it's a safe, healthy holiday for you all. 

I took the opportunity to get the kitchen table cleared off, a 3'x3' battle mat unrolled, and rather than playing a game, I set up my entire Orc & Goblin army. I've been working on this army off and on since 2020, most notably in the 4th and 5th annual Old World Army Challenges.

I am hoping to take an expanded version of this army to Da Boyz GT in 2023 for 8th Edition Warhammer Fantasy Battles. I have a pretty good idea of what I want to see happen with this army in terms of enlarging it, but I wanted to make sure I took stock of what I had first.

First up, here's the whole army:

That's 90 Orcs, 31 Goblins, 14 Hobgoblins, 4 Trolls, 5 Boars, 6 Wolves and 1 Krung Beast. It's kind of wild to realize how much I've already done.

 

First up is the newest finished unit, a squad of five Goblin Wolfboyz with bows, with an attached Goblin Big Boss. These are from Knightmare Miniatures and are phenomenally characterful sculpts; the wolf the Big Boss is riding is actually from Warmonger, as I'd accidentally snapped the ankles on the sixth Knightmare wolf. I'll be adding a second squad of Wolfboyz with bows in 2023.

Next, we have six Goblin archers, mostly Knightmare but there is one Black Tree Designs figure in there. I have a bunch of Warmonger and Black Tree archers to paint and add to this unit; it's not a huge priority because I'm not anticipating fielding this regiment in November, but I'm happy to paint them regardless.

While we're on goblins, here's a dozen Goblins and three Goblin bosses from Knightmare. I have a ton of unpainted Black Tree goblins I'll be adding to this regiment. Ultimate goal is to get it up to 40 goblins. A Knightmare Orc Shaman is visible behind the goblins.

Harboth's Orc Archers, with Harboth. I have a dozen painted here, and have a box of maybe 20 more that I could strip and repaint if I wanted. I have a special fondness for these guys - they were released just weeks after I was born. Behind them, next to the mounted commander, is my current Battle Standard Bearer for the army, with a crowned skull and crossed swords mounted on some bound-together polearms. He may ultimately find his way into a unit and be replaced as the BSB.

"Dese Lads Ova 'Ere," 1 dozen Orc Warriors from Warmonger. This unit will be expanded to 25 this year. I love the tuba player, and the banner that just bafflingly says "Eat Yer Beans" is a perennial favorite of anyone who sees it. I've got an Orc crouching with his hands over his ears coming from Warmonger in the next couple weeks who I'm hoping will let me move the musician inwards from the edge of the line.

"Dem Lads Ova Dere," another dozen Warmonger orcs that will again be bolstered to 25 in the coming weeks. The "Foot of Gork" banner was my first attempt at doing shading and highlighting on a flat surface. The foot is traced off the Monty Python's Flying Circus foot. Behind them are four Bog Trolls from Troll Soup; I received another four yesterday in the mail. I might pick up another four later on, so I can field two units of six. I'm a big fan of the one picking his nose, with a nosepicking "Orcling" from Warmonger on his base.

"The Black Fire Boyz" are more art project than planned part of the army; 15 Warmonger "Mercenary Orcs" in landsknecht garb with spears. I like the idea of a band of orcs aping Empire battlefield tactics and style, but I really don't want to keep doing puff-and-slash after these 15, so I won't be expanding this unit.

"The Old Guard" - these are my Orc Big'uns, a mix of Citadel/GW and Heartbreaker Miniatures originally released between 1985 and 1995. I've got some more Heartbreaker figures on the way, and will be scrounging through ebay and various buy-and-sell forums to expand this regiment further. I think the ultimate plan will be 38 Big'uns, with the army battle standard bearer and maybe the general attached to the unit. 

10 "Barnorsk Great Orcs" from Harlequin, remolded and reissued by Black Tree Designs a couple years ago. Buying and painting these was what sparked this whole army project; I think I want to go back and remove their citadel shields, trim the pegs and replace them with sculpted face shields from Warmonger. And maybe expand the regiment; I see myself using these as Black Orcs in WHFB. They're a pain in the ass to try and rank up, incidentally.

 

6th edition WHFB Goblin Doom Diver; I originally painted this up as a proxy 3rd edition Orc Stone Thrower (since goblins are about as smart as stones), hence the orc crew. I like the guy shading his eyes best.

Epigruel's Slop 'n' Go Chuck-Wagon. I painted this up as a baggage train in OWAC IV after finishing 1000 points of 3rd edition greenskins. The wagon and cauldron are 3D printed, the cooks, guard and boar are all Warmonger. There's a Warlord Games "Landsknecht Casualty" in the back of the wagon, waiting his turn in the pot. Obviously this is just a flavorful, fun accessory, and probably won't be making an appearance on any battlefields.

Some commanding officers; the boar chariot is a converted Warmonger Beastman chariot, with a new orc crew added. The orc in the puff-and-slash making a rude gesture was my general for OWAC IV. On the right is a classic Citadel/GW boar boy (with a shield from Knightmare), and on the left is a much larger mounted Orc Commander from Knightmare. I've been encouraged to field a general on foot, and I recognize the limitations of mounting my commander in a chariot, but I'm really tempted to put the Knightmare orc in command of the whole army, maybe attached to the unit of boar boyz I have primed and awaiting paint. 

Last but not least, we have a Hobgoblin Mercenary Contingent for 3rd edition; 12 Mourngul Renegades (I have three more to prime and paint), a commander on a Temple Dog (a Reaper Miniatures "Krung Beast" I sculpted a saddle on), and a beastmaster in need of some Hobhounds. I could use the hobgoblins to bulk out an orc regiment in 8th edition, but otherwise they might stay home.

So what's next?

First and foremost, I need to bulk out my Big'uns and my two mobs of Warmonger Boyz, along with my goblin regiment. I've got more Warmonger figures on the way, and need to sort out the goblins I have. 

More trolls. I've got four unpainted ones here, and may order another 4 to field two units of six.

Add a second Wolfboyz unit.

I have 10 Orc Boar Boyz to paint, all from Knightmare Miniatures; several of them were converted with weapon swaps, and I converted a standard bearer and musician. 

War machines will be a big addition as well; I have one bolt thrower half-painted and intend to add two more, as well as a proper Rock Lobba catapult. Two Goblin Wolf Chariots might be called for as well. 

I've been encouraged to field a Mangler Squig in 8th edition; I've got Knightmare's Giant Gnasher that will work perfectly as such.