State of the Orc Army, November 2025

 So looking back...I haven't gotten my entire Oldhammer orc and goblin army out on the table since May 2024. I have added a couple of units and big figures to the army since then, and some discussion around Warhammer: The Old World and One Page Rules Regiments with the guys I've been playing Dracula's America with got me inspired to carry everything up from the basement, array it out on the dining room table, and take stock of where I'm at.

This is my midlife crisis, by the way. No sports cars, or giant tattoos, or peroxide-blonde mistresses half my age. No, my midlife crisis is building an all-metal Warhammer army that weighs 30 lbs. The mistress might be less expensive...

First up, the goblins - 39 (plus shaman) with hand weapons, and 20 (plus shaman) with bows, two small units of 5 wolf riders with bows, and a wolf chariot, plus a character riding a wolf. I need to dig out and paint some shields for the hand weapons unit. I've got figures here from Warmonger, Knightmare, Black Tree Design, Midlam Miniatures and Games Workshop; I have another unit of wolf riders from Satyr Art Studios, as well as a couple of frankensteined chariots (including one being ridden by a shaman) in my project box still.

Next up, "Da Red Bastids" - 25 Orcs with hand weapons and shields from Warmonger Miniatures. Behind them are four Bog Trolls sculpted by Drew Williams of Satyr Art Studios years ago; I bought them from him before he sold the molds to the now-defunct Troll Soup Miniatures. I have another four Bog Trolls (purchased from Troll Soup) in my project box.

I better look at the trolls. I would run these as River Trolls in Warhammer, I think. The little runt is from Warmonger Miniatures, and the Empire casualty is a Landsknecht casualty from Warlord Games.

Up next are the Old Guard - this unit is made up almost entirely of eBay rescues, and are all sculpts initially released between 1985 and 1996. Figures here are from Games Workshop, Marauder Miniatures, Alternative Armies and Heartbreaker Miniatures.

Behind them are some artillery pieces - an eBay rescue "Doom Diver" from Games Workshop (I have another, new in box, that a friend found in their attic 20+ years after buying it), and an "Orcquebus" from Warmonger Miniatures that I proxy as a Rock Lobber. 

Up next are the "Kingbreakers" - another unit of Warmonger Orcs. I had two figures on a 25x50 base in the back row that the spaced out movement tray didn't allow me to use, so I've subbed in two orcs I painted for a baggage train. 

Behind them you can see my giant, from Old School Miniatures - I've named him Simon, after the friend who gifted him to me. The runt on the base came with the Doom Diver. 

"The Blackfire Boyz" are "Mercenary Orcs" from Warmonger Miniatures and in some of my favorite orcs that Kev Adams ever sculpted; they're encrusted with detail that brings them to life without bogging down the painting. I've painted them in the colors of Averland, the Imperial Province bordering on the Black Fire Pass and frequent defenders against orc raids in the lore of Warhammer Fantasy. The idea being, they've begun imitating the tactics of their imperial foes, and dressing in uniforms stripped off the dead. This was my first big paper banner (and first time drilling a hand for a 100mm steel flagpole) and I'm still really pleased with how it turned out.

Behind them are kind of an odd unit. These 10 "Barnorsk Great Orcs" I got from Black Tree Design in 2018, and were what initially sparked my desire to build an all-metal orc and goblin army. The paintwork is not up to my current standards and I was never happy with the old Citadel shields I put on them, so I'm not sure I'd put them on the gaming table these days; I have quite a few more (obtained with no small degree of frustration given the issues one has these days trying to buy figures from BTD!) primed and awaiting painting, so the thought is always in the back of my mind to retire these fellows and honor them as the progenitors of the entire project. 

I'm really proud of my Boar Boyz. These are from Knightmare Miniatures, and I did a fair amount of converting on these with weapon swaps, creating a standard bearer, and a musician who has a lute on his back. I'm proud of how many pig jokes I worked in - "Sum Pig," "Pork Chop," "Hog Wild," etc., and the banner is a flying pig. I think the supersized banner didn't work out quite as well this time.

"Harboth's Orc Archers," from 1987. I feel a special affinity to these guys - they first released right around the time I was born. I managed to score a phenomenally good deal on a full box set, plus some extra figures, back in 2020, and doing a full unit of 20 with freehanded face shields and a paper banner felt so satisfying. I think I can honestly say this is my favorite unit in the whole army. They're on a split movement tray so I can readily deploy them in two ranks of 10, or four ranks of 5. 

And then the characters:

I'm still really pleased with the Shaman on Wyvern figure I painted earlier this year. Still have to paint some banners for him though. 

So what's next? I have a half-finished unit of orc boyz with a shaman accompanying them, and two more units primed and waiting their turn, plus a couple chariots primed and awaiting painting/final assembly. Then there's a unit of night goblins that could be primed, more goblin archers, more trolls...I have a lot in the back log. 

I think I got demoralized for a while with this project between not having a nice display cabinet for them and realizing I just wasn't enjoying Warhammer: The Old World. The guys I played with during the summer were nice enough, but having to stop every turn and consult three rulebooks plus an errata document wasn't my idea of a good time and the other guys at the game store were quickly leaning into tournament mindsets, and that's just not me. 

Talking about One Page Rules with the guys I play Dracula's America with felt reinvigorating; I've always treated this project as some blend of actual gameable army and art project, a means of saying "Hey, 14 year old me, we finally have a really cool Warhammer army! We did it!" and I think right now I feel like gaming with them again for the first time in months. And maybe that means I'll finish painting another regiment, maybe some more chariots. Maybe I'll finally get my second orc on wyvern out and assembled in 2026. 

Returning to The Old World

 I got invited to a group chat organizing regular games of Warhammer: The Old World at my local game store. The people in the group seem nice and are painting their miniatures - and playing at a points value where I'm not going to destroy my back lugging my all-metal orcs and goblins to the store. 

So I sat down and sorted out a 1000-pt army that should be relatively well balanced. I asked for a little bit of help on Reddit, given my past experiences with being left to my own devices to build army lists. If all goes according to plan I'll be playing games on both Wednesday and Thursday this week - and with my wife's blessing and encouragement, no less! 

Da Pig Hussas - 5 Orc Boar Boyz (Big'uns), with full command, cavalry spears and shields. Standard bearer has the enchanted Banner of Butchery and the leader is wearing a 'Eadbuttin' 'At.

Dem Wots Got Stickas - 20 Night Goblins (pretend they have hooded cloaks) with shortbows, hiding two manic Fanatics in their ranks. Next to them is Wee Whistle, a Level 3 Night Goblin shaman.

Da Red Bastids - 25 Orc Boyz with hand weapons and shields and a full command.

Harboth's Orc Archers - 15 Orc Boyz with warbows, shields and full command. Behind them is a Doom Diver catapult with an Orc Bully to improve morale.

Big Boss Yorzolg - Orc Big Boss, army general, great weapon, Trollhide Trousers and a Charmed Shield on a Boar Chariot.

How they're shown here is more or less my plan for deployment as well, though if I can put the Doom Diver Catapult on a hill I will do so. Hopefully the Pig Hussas and Yorzolg can hit some enemy units in the flanks and cause some extra damage that way while the orcs soak up some charges and the Night Goblins...well, they're mainly there to launch the ultra-destructive and uncontrollable fanatics into the center of the table. 

Fistful of Lead: "Death From Above!"

Tonight I went out to my local game store and met up with a guy for a game of Fistful of Lead, using the Galactic Heroes sci-fi variant. This was my first time playing a full-sized game against an opponent (not counting the demos I ran last month) since before the pandemic! I brought out my Space Orks, and he had what I think were classic 90s Necromunda gangers of some flavor.

We used a scenario I bought off the Wiley Games website, "Death From Above," for our game tonight; our crews were fighting over possession of the controls for an ancient orbital railgun, which happened to be in the heart of a monster's lair! The monster would appear when a Joker was played, and attack the closest figure (regardless of crew) until it was either slain or another Joker was played.

I brought the monster on the board fairly early, and it ravaged his side for a bit before being dispelled by another Joker, and then a fresh, uninjured one came back on the board later that same turn, at which point it killed my heavy weapons specialist. 

My Ork Warboss arrived at the controls for the orbital weapon fairly quickly, and spent three turns trying to figure out how to activate it. He spent the rest of the game hunched over the controls, firing over and over again and never hitting anything because the template representing the blast radius of each shot kept drifting. 

Honestly, I thought I had the game in the bag towards the end - I had three figures left on the table, he had one, and two of my guys were in close combat with him. Stunningly, he turned it around - he swiftly took care of the two guys on him, reloaded his man-portable heavy laser cannon, closed the distance and sniped my Ork Warboss through a gap in the ruins, killing him instantly with a headshot! 

That's one of the things I love best about Fistful of Lead - you never can tell quite how things are going to turn out, and I was just as happy to be surprised and lose like that as I would have been in victory. 

We'll be meeting up again soon for another game, and we had a few curious onlookers we spoke to who might be interested in joining in the future. Fingers crossed on that front, it would be great to get a few more people playing. 

First Game of Warhammer: The Old World

 I had a really nice afternoon at the game store today, got to chat with a couple of good guys, picked up a bit of scatter terrain for my big game at Wargames Among the Warplanes in June, and of course got my very first game of Warhammer: The Old World in!

I had the worst dice luck I can remember ever having in 20 years of gaming. I could not pass a Leadership test. My trolls, even with a babysitter, could not pass a Stupidity test, and remained irreversibly stupid. I could not successfully charge. 

But that's fine - I'm not playing orcs to *win*, I'm playing orcs to laugh when things go awry - for example, my trolls spending three turns staring in befuddlement at a giant eagle before getting obliterated by it. 

The High Elf General charges my orc spearmen.

My General charges the High Elf General and is promptly killed.

The last of my trolls falling to the Sky-Cutter. 

Even in losing, I enjoyed the experience, and my opponent was a gracious teacher (who, unfortunately, is moving out of the area next week). Another guy I talked to offered to meet me for games any time I'm available so this will not be my last game. 

Figures Purchased in 2025: 58

Figures Painted in 2025: 70

Happy Easter and Some Gaming

 Happy Easter to all my readers who celebrate. We're having a very low-key Sunday here, nothing too fancy on the menu or any visiting planned. Except...

On Friday, I found out that my local game store, Harlequin Hobby, is open for gaming today and there were people looking to play Warhammer: The Old World. I happen to have an army for Warhammer: The Old World. With no other plans, I cleared an afternoon spent at the game store with my wife, and asked if anybody would be open to a 500-point game to help me learn the ropes. Having confirmed that someone would be happy to do so, I drew up plans for a 500-point army that would be easy to transport.

I threw my back out earlier this week and am still on the mend, and it's situations like this that might maybe make me curse my deep love of metal miniatures. 

So here's what I'm taking to the store today:

Orc General on Boar. Figure by Knightmare.

Goblin Wolf Riders with Bows. Figures by Foundry/Warmonger

Orc Spearmen in looted Empire uniforms. Figures by Foundry/Warmonger

Trolls originally from Satyr Art Studios, currently OOP. Goblin handler by Knightmare.

I'll be back later with a play report or two!

Figures Purchased in 2025: 58

Figures Painted in 2025: 70

Finished Goblin Regiment

 I'm trying to work down my leadpile, and this regiment of goblins has been staring at me waiting to be finished since October. I painted the first dozen back in 2021 as part of the Old World Army Challenge, then came back to them last year to try and round them out to a regiment of useful size for Warhammer: The Old World. I got bogged down last year with seven figures left to go to reach my target of 40 figures. 

Tonight, I finished those last seven figures, giving me a unit of 39 goblins with a full command, accompanied by a shaman. There's still a few shields to paint and affix but overall I'm happy calling them done. The figures are a mix from Knightmare Miniatures, Harlequin/Black Tree Design, and Midlam Miniatures, all sculpted by Goblinmaster Kevin Adams.

My favorite figure in the unit is a bit of an easter egg in the back row - a goblin eating a meat pie (with a rat tail hanging out of it) and apparently burning his tongue on it. 

I've also knocked out a trio of treasure markers - I'm going to be running some demo games of Fistful of Lead on March 8th at my local game store, and I've put together a simple scenario with groups of orcs squabbling over the division of loot following a battle. I'm hoping I can lure a couple people in. I forget where the treasure pile with the shield and chest came from, but the other two are from Reaper Miniatures - and all three have been in my bits box for the better part of a decade. 

Figures Purchased in 2025: 40

Figures Painted in 2025: 47

Warhammer: The Old World - Finally happening for me?!?

 So as readers of the blog will know, I've been slowly building an all metal Orc & Goblin army that I could use in any edition of Warhammer Fantasy Battles, The Old World, Kings of War, Oathmark, Dragon Rampant, etc. These days that project is more "art project" than anticipated "wargaming army," in large part due to the sheer weight of 200+ metal orcs, and also very much a "hey, 14 year old me - you did it. You built a Warhammer army, and it's awesome."

Well, asking around on Facebook, I found out there's a game store local to me that seems to prioritize wargaming and Warhammer, and there's a bunch of people there who are playing Warhammer: The Old World. 

I'd initially intended to drop by tonight and talk to a few of them, maybe watch a game in progress, but I got 4 hours of sleep last night and spent two hours today getting my internet turned back on, so by the time game-time rolled around I just didn't have the energy to get back in the car and drive 20 minutes each way, plus socializing. 

What I did do today, though, is go through the "Ravening Hordes" book of army lists and build myself a little 1000-point army; I'm hoping I can convince someone at the store to play a smaller game like this while I learn the rules more thoroughly, so that I don't have to try and schlep 2000 points of metal figures to the store and home. 

The whole army in one shot.

Characters - Orc Warboss on Boar Chariot, and Level 2 Orc Weirdboy

Da Red Bastids - 25x Orc Mob, hand weapons, shields and light armor, full command

Harboth's Black Mountain Boys - 20x Orc Mob, hand weapons, warbows, shields and light armor, full command

Cubsnatchers - 5x Goblin Wolf Riders, short bows and hand weapons

Da Red Stikkas - 20x Goblin Mob, hand weapons and short bows

Da Bilgesquatters - 3x River Troll Mob, great weapons

This will hopefully prove a fairly balanced force to start learning the game with, and one I can easily expand for larger games. 

I'll be paying the store a visit tomorrow (I need to restock a few things in my toolkit), and fingers are very much crossed that I'll make my triumphant return to in-person wargaming with a return to where my wargaming journey began - a Greenskins army for Warhammer. 

Planning Ahead for 2025

 First things first...Goblins are still in progress.

With October being "Orctober," my immediate goal for October 2024 is to finish off the unit of 40 goblins, plus shaman and three "Lurking Skulkers" that, under more recent versions of Warhammer Fantasy Battles (and now Warhammer: The Old World), can hide in regular goblin regiments and leap out when melee begins to try and shank the front row of the enemy unit. I'm also aiming to have my 2002 Ruglud's Armored Orcs regiment completed by the end of the month.

Beyond that, I'm looking forward towards 2025 and giving myself a dedicated project to work on in the new year. My wife and I just watched the new FX adaptation of James Clavell's Shogun, and enjoyed it very much; between that and listening to the Yarkshire Wargamer podcast interview with Trevor Dixon of Dixon Miniatures, my thoughts have circled back towards a long-standing desire to paint samurai.

So I placed an order with North Star for a couple of skirmish rulebooks - Ronin, from Osprey Games, and Daisho, from the Ministry of Gentlemanly Warefare - two prepacked warbands for Ronin, and then another order with Badger Games here in the USA for a couple packs of Bad Squiddo Feudal Japan warrior women. 

These will get me started for samurai painting and wargaming; eventually I'll pick up "Test of Honour" as well and start expanding my forces and building terrain. I've also dug a few samurai I bought in 2016 out of my bits box - a couple from Reaper Miniatures and a pair of AEG "Clan Wars" samurai archers, long out of production, that I'd bought off someone on Facebook. From there I'll start adding Perry and Dixon Miniatures samurai and retainers to the mix. 

Progress Report

 The Fireworks Stand itself is completed; I've got Mark himself and a few resin bits I want to glue into the fireworks stand still to complete, but I might leave those for another day.

Correction: I am absolutely leaving those for another day. Why? Because Goblins, that's why. 

Right now, with having just bought a house and making arrangements for insurance, a snowplow service for our driveway for the winter, and a sudden leak in our ceiling that manifested during a thunderstorm last night, I am more or less on Hobby No-Buy for the foreseeable future. I'll replace paints as they run out/dry out and buy some supplies here and there, but no new miniatures or terrain pieces for a while. Fortunately, I have quite the ample "Closet of Opportunity" to pull from. And October is in view, and that means Orctober, meaning I paint some more greenskins for my ongoing Oldhammer Orc & Goblin army. 

And I am drastically short on painted goblins. 20 archers, 10 wolf riders, and a dozen infantry with hand weapons are all I've got to show of the smaller, weedier grots. I've been meaning to get the dozen foot-sloggers bolstered up to a much more robust regiment of 40, and I think now's a perfect time to get those done. 

Here's a shot of the 40-figure movement tray loaded up with painted and unpainted goblins alike to get a sense of the project at hand. Most of these are either Knightmare Miniatures or Black Tree Design/Harlequin, but two figures here are from Midlam Miniatures - and all 40 are from the talented hands of Kev "Goblinmaster" Adams. I even got to include a fun little easter egg to reward sharp-eyed viewers; one of the goblins in the last row has thrust his club through a belt loop and is taking the time to scarf down a meat pie - one that has a rat's tail hanging out of it. 

There is a painted figure in the back row of that photo; he's one of a handful of Black Tree goblins I painted back in 2018, when I first decided I wanted to try building an all-metal Orc & Goblin army, and was still figuring out color schemes and skin tones. I wound up stripping the paint off of all of those the other day and selecting a few to repaint and include in this unit - replacing the figures with spears in the above picture with ones holding clubs or scimitars. 

I also get an extra shaman figure back for use in my army; I'd especially never been happy with the paint job I'd given him back in 2018, so looking forward to doing a better job on him this time around.